REPENT NOW

today i gave money to christians. Please, please, please do not hold it against me. Please, please do not erase me forever from the annals of the secular scientific saved. Please do not revoke my born again buddha card. Please do not preclude me from pagan parties. Please do not exclude me from evolution. Please do not think I've gone mad. Please, when I stand at the last gasp, in front of the great golden globe awards, please, please, please do not send me to the same hell that will contain jerry falwell, anita bryant, cardinal o'connor and pat robertson. Please. i repent.

It was the carrot cake that did it. Christian people can bake carrot cake. They do it well. I'm sure the kitchen they bake it in is as bright and cheery as a norman rockwell painting, with little black and white children looking on in awe, their cheeks flushed with anticipation, as mommie-like matrons in aprons hand out bits of dough, and pans to lick. I know, I know. It's all illusion, I know. I know it's a trick. I know they would bake me if they knew me. I know. But...doggone...the flesh is weak and the tastebud strong...

I bought carrot cake from some christians today.
AND
(oh dog! the sin...)
I also bought apple crisp.

mea culpa, mea culpa mea maxima culpa....